


Again at high school

by ArteCalima



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Adult Content, Anger, Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Best friends with Hermione, Caffeine Addiction, Coffee, Denial of Feelings, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, H&R wedding, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Hogwarts, Hufflepuff being more like Slytherin, Kissing, Malfoy is a cold ass at the beggining, Malfoy likes being called PROFESSOR, Oral Sex, Post-Battle of Hogwarts, Professor Draco Malfoy, Professor Hermione Granger, Professor Malfoy makes out with student, Remembering the Dead, Rough Sex, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Smut, Vaginal Sex, alcohol drinking, but Malfoy saves it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:41:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27471397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArteCalima/pseuds/ArteCalima
Summary: What happens when your magical powers shows up little bit late? And what would happen in Hogwarts when adult woman is sexualy deprivated because she has to go to hight school again with just younger kids?..................................Please excuse my inproper grammar, syntax and sometimes my choice of vocabluary - I'm no native speaker. I do what I can and would be glad for any constructive critics............................I have written more chapters but will post probably just once a week (Sunday), maybe earlier if I have enough time.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Original Female Character(s), Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley
Kudos: 14





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is just beggining to the story so it is shorter, but next chapters should be longer, don't worry. 
> 
> I would be thrilled if you comment ;)

You had pretty strange month. You couldn’t put a finger on it, but it was really unnerving – the things that had keep happening to you. It all started when you were on your way to your job. Thinking about what will be your first assignment for the day in the office, you were crossing the street. All in thoughts you didn’t notice the car driving very fast in your direction. Just in the middle of the crossroad you spun your head but the car was too close already. You just had enough time to put your hands up to your eyes as to cover them so you wouldn’t see the car hitting you. There was loud crash but nothing really touched you. After a few seconds you opened your eyes and were staring at the car crushed just a few centimeters from your toes as if against some invisible wall.

You couldn’t wrap your mind around it but moved on after the police interviewed you. But all those strange things kept happening.

Than one evening when you was totally spent from work returning just around 8pm you couldn’t wait just to put your legs up on the table and watch something on TV. You unlocked the flat door and entered the room. Something felt off. You turned around, realizing the lights were on, and find yourself staring at some strangely looking old woman.

“What the fuck are you doing here!” you said with voice that indicated fear. _Hell – some woman was in your apartment, of course you were scared._

“Miss Jennifer Cought? It’s pleasure to meet you. My name is Minerva McGonagall.” Said the woman while sitting again on your sofa where she was probably sitting just moments before you entered.

“How do you know my name? And what are you doing in my apartment?” you asked, really scared now. _Who the hell was this McGonagall person and what does she want from you?_

“I understand that in last weeks, some unexplainable things happened to you, right? Well, I’m here to explain them and have an offer for you. Please, sit down.” She motioned to the seat next to her, her tone commanding. Scared as you were, you weren’t going to argue with some bloody crazy woman and you sit, just as little as it was possible if you would have to run.

“My dear, I know this will sound crazy to you, but I want you to let me finish. When I do, you may ask questions, all right?” she asked and you nodded.

“As I said, my name is Minerva McGonagall and I’m a principal of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. We have student in age of 11 to 18 attending. Some already have parents who are wizards some are so called mugglebornes as you are – children to non-magical parents. Our students usually have some display of strange events behind them. That is the time we search for them. They get the letter about our school and that they had been accepted to it.”

You couldn’t stop yourself from asking, voice irritated: “Why are you telling me this?” thinking this lady has extended amount of issues.

She eyed you sternly but answered with soft tone: “You have special abilities – you are a witch, Miss Cought. And I’m here to tell you that you would be welcomed in our school so you would be able to control your powers. No, don’t interrupt me and let me finish!” she said more harshly when you were just taking breath to argue with her.

“The last month must have been really hard on you, given all strange and scary stuff going on. I may name the car accident for instance. Something you couldn’t explain. It has happened because you have magical power inside you. It saved your life that day. It was the day we started to watch you and now I’m certain that you truly ARE a witch and should attend our school.” ended her speech Miss McGonagall.

You shifted at your seat, sitting more comfortably. You knew you must be crazy even considering this, but it really was a crazy month with some crazy stuff happening. Then you remembered something McGonagall said.

“You said your school was for kids between 11 and 18. I’m 21 already. You probably must have mistaken me with someone else.” you tried to suggest.

“I just told you about the accident month ago and you still think that I’m mistaken?” she asked a rethorical question not expecting you to answer and continued right away. “You made a point with the age and I honestly don’t have an explanation for it. Magical power usually shows itself at most at the age of 11. I’ve never heard of someone who would display magical power after that. Well, till I heard about you. That is actually the reason why am I here personally. Do not think that I come to every first year to invite them to Hogwarts. But in this case I had sensed that only a letter wouldn’t do the job so I decided to come here personally.” said McGonagall while eyeing you cautiously.

“I… Ehm… Have you… Have I…” you have some problems expressing yourself. After clearing your throat you just stand up and make your way to a fridge and take vodka outside of it and pour yourself a full glass. Then empty it and pour another, not looking at McGonagall. When you empty your second glass, you finally look at her. She is still watching you and waiting patiently for you to say anything.

“I had to take a drink.” You lift the glass as to back up your statement. She just titles her head. That kind of upset you.

“So what now? I quit my job and run after you to one of a hell freak school? I’ve been to school for most of my life already. I would be older than all other students there. Do you really believe it would work?” you ask angrily. _How could she think you would leave everything behind just for some stranger woman?_

“I understand you concern, dear. I’ve got already all things settled. Just so you would understand. If you won’t come with me, you might be danger not just to yourself, but also to others. This power you have, that I have, if its uncontrolled may have fatal damage.” She says with sadness in her voice. “As to answer all of your questions. Yes, I expect you to leave your job and go with me to Hogwarts. We would still have to discuss most of the things, but this I can tell you. Our students are divided into four houses, each having their own dormitories. You would be assign to one of the houses as well but wouldn’t have your room in there unlike other students. It would be close enough so you could use the common room but also separated so you would have some privacy. I also think it should be possible for you to sit with the stuff and I will grant you access to our staffroom. I believe you will be able to even found some friends among students but I get that some contact with other adults would be appreciated.”

You are still standing next to your countertop, playing with empty glass. You feel the alcohol spreading in your veins and already numbing your mind. It kind of gives this situation even more impression it is a dream.

………………………………………………………………………….

The evening McGonagall first visited you ended with you politely excusing yourself. McGonagal wished you good night and disappear in front of your eyes.

In the morning you thought it was probably just very strange dream but then the owl came with a list of things that you needed to buy and a note that someone will arrange your dismissal at work. When you called there, they didn’t even know who you were.

_Well, that’s just amazing. One is building up his carrier and then some witch shows up and everything goes to hell._

Just as you were having lunch someone knocked. Opening the door with full mouth of your lasagna you stare at young woman, possibly the same age as you are. You swallow your bite and politely ask the woman: “May I help you?”

“Hello, I’m Hermione Granger.The headmistress McGonagall sent me here to help you with your shopping and answer possible question.” And so became your preparation for another high school.

…………………………………………………………………………

As you found out, Hermione is actually only 2 years older than you are, teaching ancient runes and muggle studies at Hogwards. At school, you will have to call her professor but for now, before the term starts, you both call each other by your first names. You two were chatting about life, as well as magical as muggle – it turned out Hermione is muggle-born so it was quite easy to talk to her about normal stuff. She helped you with your bucket list, showed you the Alley and spent next few days explaining everything to you and even though your head was spinning from all the new information, you were actually starting to look forward to your new school.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So Jenny is already on her way to Hogwarts, so just sit and enjoy this chapter :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would be glad if you comment, I will answer every single one. Let me know how you like the story line and my style of writing or whatever you want to tell me :D

You wake up right on time to have breakfast and get yourself prepared for the train that will take you the school.

With a yawn you get up and get yourself a coffee before doing anything else. It wakes you up a little more so you move to your room. On the chair next to your bed lays a white shirt and black trousers you prepared yourself the previous evening.

You get dressed and do your make up, nothing too eye-catching, just some black eyeliner and mascara. Deciding you are too nervous to eat anything you put your heels on and take the trunk. Fortunately Hermione arranged that some of your luggage had been already transported to the school. Being an adult student probably has some perks.

When you finally get to the crouded train station almost every student is already in the train. You quickly move to the closest door and try to get your luggage behind you.

“Here, let me help you.” You hear some boy saying and your bag suddenly levitates itself right next to you. “There you are. I’m Josh, by the way. I’ve never seen you here before.” He offers you hand.

You shake it and introduce yourself: “Hi, I’m Jenny. I’m actually just starting. You are in the 7th year?” you ask trying to guess the boy’s age.

“I’m. Wau that is interesting.” reacts Josh. “Well, I guess I will see more of you then.” he says and walks around you to get his seat.

You shyly smile and walk through the train trying to find some free spot. You find one at the end of the second waggon and not wanting to search anymore you sit with five 11 year olds. The talk they are having is exhausting so you get up after a while and just stand at the corridor looking out of the window. In less than 10 minutes you are joined with another student – girl from Gryffindor house. You talk for almost 2 hours. In that time you find out a lot about her – her favorite subject, what she wants to do after her NEWT’s she is going to do this year, her pet’s name and many more. Actually, most of the time she talks and you listen, glad that you don’t have to talk about your boring  
non-magical job or other stuff.

As the arriving time comes closer, everyone gets changed and so do you. You had already shirt and trousers you would be wearing on – it’s just black and white set so you used one of those you wore to work. You particularly liked this shirt because it flatter your bosom, which is must say larger that you would liked sometimes, but other times you just let it be what it is and are proud of it – and this shirt makes it easier. You just put the wardrobe around your shoulders and wait till the train stops.

………………………………………………………………..

You still can’t believe your eyes when you are walking toward the Great hall. Hermione – well, now Professor Granger – picked you up right of the train station and accompanied you to the castle. Other first years are still on their way and the ceremony shouldn’t start earlier than 15 minutes so you are going to be introduced to the staff in the staffroom.

As Hermione – _hell, you are never going to get used to calling her professor_ – opens the door to the staffroom, she gives you reassuring smile. You think that you probably already found a friend in here – at least you hope so.

“Hello, I want to introduce to you Miss Jennifer Cought, our oldest first year ever.”Hermione says and motions to you.

You smile feeling little bit anxious – _What if they won’t like me?_ Most of the people in the room must be at least 50 but there are some younger faces. Except Hermione, there is also another woman around 30, introduced as Lena Holystone, the teacher of astronomy, and a man around same age as Hermione, slight and tall with platinum hair and deep grey eyes. You shake hand with everyone, smiling and trying to remember everyone’s name.

As you move to shake hand with the young man, he eyes you coldly and even more coldly says “Miss Cought.” and walks out of the staffroom. You turn around confused.

“Did I do something wrong?” you ask, your cheeks burning.

“Oh no, you didn’t, dear. He is just like this. Don’t worry about it.” answers you professor Sprout.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

The ceremony starts. The first years march into the hall. You go at the end, kind of looking like teacher looking after a kindergarden kids. You look around and the sigh takes you your breath. There are candles floating above your head and it looks like open sky is above them. The room looks literary magical – as it should in school like this. There is a lot of students and truth to be told, most of them are looking at you as you don’t particularly fitting in with the height and age to the other first years. You feel your face going pink form all the gazes. You think that you should probably choose some other shoes because these didn’t make you just higher but also sexier, as you well know from the men you had been with (it wasn’t that many, just enough you know what is does to men). You stop in front of the stairs and above them is a chair with old hat. You look behind it where the staff table is and find Hermione eye. She smiles at you encouragingly. You also get a glimpse of that young professor who was so cold to you just few moments ago. He is watching you and you feel your face going pink again.

“Dear students. It is my pleasure to greet you all in next year. I especially want to greet our new first years. I hope this year is going to be productive and successful as the others have been since the war.” says the headmistress. You wink at the mention of war. You don’t recall anything that could have been called war in England since the WWII. You make a note in your head to ask Hermione about it later.

“…..and now we may start with the sorting. Professor Granger, please.” The headmistress points her hand at the chair.

Now Hermione starts talking – about the history of the ritual and how it was for her to get sorted in her first year into Gryffindor. When she approaches the hat, most of the first years jump up as the hat starts to sing. When it ends, Hermione continues.

“The first one on our list is Jennifer Cought. She is going to attend the classes as other first years although she is 10 years older than them. I do wish that everyone will act respectful and helpful toward her – now I’m targeting the 7th years. Jennifer, please…” she motions for you to sit at the chair.

You take the steps and sit at the chair. Hermione places the hat on your head. It talks to itself, commenting your age and this unusual situation. Finally after what feels like ages calls loud enough for everyone to hear: Hufflepuff!!!

There is a lot of cheering and Hermione lifts the hat. She smiles and then quietly tells you “After the feast, follow the prefect with other Hufflepuff first years. I will come collect you after that and show you your own room.”

You nod and then approach the Hufflepuff table. As Hermione informed you, for this evening you would have to sit with other students, but after that it would be possible to join the staff table. You sit between one girl and one boy, around 16 years old, both looking pleased to meet you.

Your attention gets back to the sorting. It is interesting – each house getting about the same number of new students. When the ceremony ends, the feast begins.

……………………………….

You get up as the prefects starts to call all first years to lead them to their dormitories. You follow your prefect, which is a boy who was sitting not far away from you. He introduces himself as Bill and takes off out of the Great hall. You walk at the end again, trying to remember the way so you wouldn’t get lost next time you walk this way alone.

The Hufflepuff dormitories are right next to the kitchen as your prefect points out.

 _Well, that doesn’t sound bat at all._ You think for yourself and make a point to find out if they have coffee in here. _Oh my, what would I do if they do not have coffee?_

The entrance to your common room is through a door concealed like a barrel. To enter it, one must tap the barrel in specific order in the rhythm of **Helga Hufflepuff**.

Bill shows you all you have to know about common room. It is circular room with low ceiling. There is lot of plants – some on the round windows, others hanging from the ceiling and some just standing on the floor. After a while Bill decides it was time to end the tour and takes other first years to their rooms. You sit at the couch near the fire place and look around the place. It is really cozy, this common room – just perfect for chatting with friends or reading a book with a cup of coffee.

You hear someone outside on the corridor calling something. You don’t understand what but you get up and open the door. You see Hermione with a big smile on her face.

“A little difficulty with Hufflepuff dormitory is that you actually can’t knock on the door even if you know which one of the barrels is the right one. If you knock in the wrong rhythm, you get splashed with vinegar. And although teachers know the places of the houses dormitories, we don’t know their passwords unless it is dormitory of their house.” she explains to you enthusiastically when you ask her why she didn’t just knock.

“So, what do you think? About the ceremony I mean.” clarifies Hermione while leading you through the corridor.

“It was really charming. And the people from my house seem nice. Well, I didn’t spoke to any first year yet but the two I was sitting next to at the table seemed friendly.” you say to her as she stops in front of large tapestry with tree in the center.

“I’m glad to hear that. Here – your password for now is Cranberries. You may change it later, I’ll show you how.” As she said the password, the tapestry swings forward and reveals a small but cozy room with comfortable bed in Hufflepuff house colors, table with chair and sofa at the other side. There is even a bookshelf large enough for all your study books and some fiction you brought with from home.

“Here is a bathroom with shower so you wouldn’t have to go to the common one in the Hufflepuff dormitories.” she motions toward the door on our left hand.

“It’s beautiful, thank you.” you walk around your new room.

“I, ehm, would have left you here, but the Headmistress wants you in the staffroom so you could discuss some stuff and special rules for you.”

“Right, OK, then better not keep the Headmistress waiting.” you smile at her and head out of the room. You will have plenty of time to get settled in there later.

…………………………………….

There are a lot of people in the staffroom and the Headmistress is sitting at the table next to the window. It is completely dark outside and the room is lit only by candles floating in the air by the walls, moving up and down a bit in a steady rhythm.

“Here you are, Miss Cought. Please, sit. There are some rules that apply for all of our students, but I thought that it would be a little humiliating for you to keep them. For instance calling the night at 9 o’clock. I wouldn’t want you to wander the corridors much at night but I believe you are competent enough to go to bed when you are tired.” Start talking McGonagall not waiting for you to sit at the opposite site of the table.

“Thanks a lot. I really appreciate it. I heard about the village – Hogsmeade I think. Would I be allowed to go there?” you ask pushing your luck.

“I didn’t think about it, actually, but I do not see a problem in it. You are adult, so yes, you may go there whenever you like.”

You discuss more of the rules that wouldn’t apply for you or be modified for you. As for the length of your studies, you agree on the half time. That means a lot of studying on your own but also not spending a half time spend behind the school desk. You also will have to take some private courses with the professors but it should be manageable.

As you are discussing all of this with McGonagall, professor Sprout gives you a cup with red wine. You accept it happily. Not that you like red wine that much, you are more a white wine person – or a vodka in some situations, but after a day like this, any alcohol is welcomed.

You drink your wine and chat with the professors trying to find out more about living in Hogwarts and life of wizards in general. As the 11 hour goes by you decide to go to bed.

Your luggage had been moved to your room sometime between so you take out your cosmetic bag and head for the bathroom. Then lay in your bed, naked as you are used to from home, just in your panties. You are little light headed and you feel the sleep creeping in on you and you let yourself drift into the dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed it and you may look forward to third chapter next week.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First week of school and first complications. And girls night, not to forget!! :)

The first week of the school was hectic. You hadn’t settle yet and already had lots of homework to do and essays to write. You find that you really like the ancient runes under Hermione and also herbology with professor Sprout. You don’t do that well in charms but neither does any of the other first years so you don’t give it that much significance. You co-worked in astronomy with Emily and Brad, another first years, although 10 years younger, but didn’t found much common ground for normal chat. They were nice and friendly, but the age gap is probably too big for friendship – they would be more like younger siblings and you for that part the older annoying one.

It is Friday and the last class you are supposed to attend are double potions with professor Malfoy. You feel little nervous about it. Mr. Malfoy hadn’t been much of a friendly person, or didn’t seem so, and you know this type of teachers, always giving students hard time, silently laughing at them.

You enter the potions classroom and stand beside the table as other students do. The walls are all black stone and the lanterns are glowing with dim green light. Professor Malfoy enters the room exactly on time, neither second earlier nor later. He walks to his desk with swift steps. He is dressed all in black as for a funeral – formal and polished.

 _Ha, maybe it is going to be mine funeral…_ you think ironically. _But it looks good on him though, the suit with black shirt and tie…Goes well with his almost white hair._

He starts talking with a cold bored voice about basic rules in his classes. You follow his instructions, writing everything down. He walks around the room looking on everyone so you expect him to look at you when he is near, but he doesn’t. He literary ignores you.

 _It might be for the better,_ you thought for yourself.

The lesson goes well, till he asks you a question. Not that you wouldn’t know the answer, you have written it down just moments before, but when he looks at you with the smirk on his face and cold eyes – _but what eyes are they - grey, deep, beautiful_ … you get a bit lost in them and you totally forgot everything, even your own name.

 _Amazing, just amazing. As if I’m some teenage girl falling for her teacher. Stop right there._ You talk yourself over after professor Malfoy gave you speech about how “irresponsible it is from you, given your situation not to listen and that with this attitude he really is not seeing you making two terms in one”. You can’t stop yourself from rolling your eyes.

“Miss Cought – detention on Monday, here at 8 pm. And 20 points from Hufflepuff for your ignorance.” Says Malfoy with sharp voice and then continue with his lecture.

You storm out of the class right after it’s over. You are so angry with him, with yourself, with this whole situation.

You choose to calm yourself with a hot shower. You strip off your clothes and spent good 15 minutes just standing under the hot stream of water. After that you take your bathrobe, soft and warm and sit in the sofa.

Hermione gave you a book about recent history – more accurately the war Mrs. McGonagall was talking about at the ceremony some days back. You open the book and start reading.

You stop just when your stomach gives you signal that you should eat something. It is nearly over the time for dinner so you dress yourself quickly and head to the Great hall to find if there is anything left for you. Fortunately there is and you grab some vegetable with sauce and bread and head on the spot beside Hermione who is sitting at the staff table, reading a thick book while eating cornflakes.

“Cornflakes for dinner?” you ask mockingly. You ate beside Hermione the whole week and you to become pretty close even in this short time.

“I didn’t really know what I was grabbing. Just too much interested in the book..” she raise her head from the book, smirking.

“How was your day? Anything interesting?” she asks and continues eating her dinner with one hand while the other holds the book open.

“If I can talk to you as to a friend,” you say and she nods “I would say that the Malfoy guy is a dick.” You say quietly so no one else would hear you. Hermione burst into laughter.

“What?” you ask laughing with her.

“It just… Is a little funny… You see, I was in the same year as Malfoy was and.. Well… we didn’t get well either. But I think he have changed, since the war.” she ends the sentence with thoughtful face.

“I actually just read the book you gave me. He was the one who let Death Eaters into the castle? How is he teaching here?” you ask a question which was in your head from the moment you read about it.

Hermione’s face goes even more serious. “As I said, he changed. At least I think so. There had been trials and nor he, nor his mother got sentenced, just had to pay some fine. It was mostly Harry’s doing. They helped our cause at the very end of the war, both of them. And Dumbledore never believed Draco really being a bad person. So McGonagall let him in here, make some good by teaching others.” she explains all seriousness now.

“Ehm.. All right..” you answer not sure how to respond to that.

“You know, one would think he would want to get more involved, now that Voldemort is out of the game, move on, and make some new friends. But he just seems to avoid every possible chance to get close with any of the professors.” Hermione continues more to herself then to you now.

You just nod and start eating. You still don’t understand why he behaved as he did but maybe he had some good reason for that. You feel little ashamed of yourself that you automatically thought badly of him. Maybe with time it will get better.

………………………………………………………………

It doesn’t actually. It gets even a bit worse over the weeks so you get angry every time you see him. You understand why he doesn’t go to any night in the staffroom – they would have to strangle him.

_Yeah, yeah yeah, Hufflepuffs are friendly and forgiving and blah blah blah… Well, not all of them – here am I._

What made your mood even worse is that in magical world, they don’t drink coffee. _Like really – how do they even get up?_ You lived through the first weeks without it just thanks to a really black tea – a lot of it, but you start feeling frustrated and fucking tired.

Thankfully, Hermione promised to get you some so you would be able to do it yourself in the kitchens. When you go there the next Monday morning, still partly sleeping, the house elf nearest to the entrance probably takes pity of you and makes you a perfect cup of coffee himself. You drink it quickly burning your tongue but not caring and ask for another to go. The elf looks satisfied and happy that you liked what he made. It makes you smile. With a thermo mug you get back into your room, get dressed and head up to your first class this day. _Yes, no breakfast. You have your coffee and need nothing more._

You feel the caffeine pumping through your veins and you feel finally alive after last days feeling like a walking dead. You tried once to make a joke about it, but these wizards didn’t have a clue what you were talking about.

The week starts with charms and you slowly drink your coffee while listening to professor Flitwick. When it comes to really doing magic it is still not as good as you wish it would be, but you get better with time. And with your super energy potion – _ha ha_ – you really do pretty well. Even so that professor gives 10 points to Hufflepuff for your levitating charm.

You agreed with Hermione earlier to have some drinks at the evening at the Hogsmeade. You two get along really well, usually talking about some news in magic or muggle world, politics, but also love live like real good friend should. She told you so much about Ronald Weasley that you feel almost like you know him yourself. You can see that she is really in love with this man.

As the evening comes closer, you take a shower and dress prettily in black dress embracing your figure, take yellow high heels and yellow scarf. You look at the mirror and think about how strange it is – yellow was never your color, but since you’ve been sorted to Hufflepuff, you kind of find it more likable. What more, you bought new shoes and many other accessories in this color.

You head out of the castle thinking about the essay you should write tomorrow and almost knock down Draco Malfoy at the gates.

“Ouch… Sorry, I didn’t see you..” you babble trying to get some balance.

“Professor..” he says with his usual voice.

“What?” you look at him confused.

“It’s I didn’t see you, professor.” he says with emphasis on the professor word.

 _You have to be kidding me._ You think but stop yourself from rolling your eyes, remembering last time you did it you got detention – and not a pleasant one.

“Well then, I’m sorry, professor.” You correct yourself with a little ironic edge at the end. Malfoy looks at you, snorts and heads toward the castle.

You look after him, watching him – or rather that firm ass of his. When you realize what you are doing, you clear your throat and look for Hermione. She walks past Malfoy and waves at you. When she approaches you hug her, and both of you get on your way to Hogsmeade.

While driving the carriage, Hermione is talking about the animals that are pulling them. You don’t see them, which according to her means you’ve never saw anyone die – which is true. You speak before you can stop yourself from asking such a dump question.

“Who did you see die?” there is a pained look on her face and her eyes are full of tears now.

“No, I’m sorry, I didn’t want to upset you.. I shouldn’t have asked, I’m so sorry…” you try to comfort her and rub her back.

“No… It’s ok… You… Should know…” she says through the sobs.

“The war was hard on everyone but.. Well, Harry was kind of in the middle of everything so we saw a lot of death actually.” she continues but you stop her.

“What about talk about it with a drink?” you suggest and she accepts with a warm smile which doesn’t reach her eyes.

When you get to the three broomsticks it’s almost 9 o’clock but that doesn’t bother you. Now you have your coffee you may be up all night if needed. The pub is half full. There is lots of talking and some music playing at the background. You choose table in the corner while Hermione orders you drinks.

“What is this?” you ask glaring at something like a beer but with some wrong color.

“It’s a butterbeer. Try it. It’s quite sweet and my favorite.” You do try and find it also quite tasty so you take another gulp.

Hermione sits next to you and looks at her glass. “You know, it’s been long since I’ve talked about it with anyone beside Ron or Harry. And we don’t talk about it much. They do not like it because it hurts even though it is already 5 years. But I…. I’m still not over it and maybe I need to talk about it.” She admits and looks at you.

“I’m here for you, anytime. So, you wanted to say something…” you look at her expectantly.

“Yes. You know, even when you see hundredth of deaths, you remember every one of them pretty clearly. Or at least I do. The first one I saw…” she takes a gulp of her own butterbeer to splash her dry mouth. It obviously isn’t easy for her to talk about it. Then, she continues: “The first was Harry’s godfather – Sirius. It was in our fifth year.”

You watch her with open mouth. “You had been so young. How much were you? 14?” you ask unbelievingly.

“Yes, around that. It was tough.” She states. “Before that, there had been Cedric Diggory but only Harry witnessed the death itself. We saw just the body he dragged out of the maze. He was Hufflepuff, you know?”

“I heard about him. There is his picture on the shelf above the fireplace at the common room.” You remember.

Hermione nods and continues. “After Sirius was Dumbledore. I didn’t see him die either really – there was just professor Snape, Draco, and Harry, but I was down at the bottom of the tower watching him hit the ground. It was terrible.” She goes silent as if she ended her speech.

You wink at the mention of Malfoy being present at Dumbledore’s death but don’t ask about it since it would be kind of off topic.

“I read about him, I mean - Dumbledore. He sounded like amazing man, clever.” You remark.

“He was. And he was really close to Harry, but it affected us all a lot. Next was Dobby, I think – he used to be a house elf of Malfoys until Harry helped him become a free elf. He was amazing… He died protecting us.” her eyes are full of tears again and she has unfocused look, probably seeing the moment again.

You feel bad for pulling this all subject up. “Hey, we really don’t have to talk about it.”

“No. It was a long time since I remembered them. They deserve it.” She shakes her head and takes a sip again. You do as well to keep up with her.

“Through the battle, there were so many, you know. Many I didn’t even know by their name. I know that I saw Levander Brown. She used to date Ron back in the sixth year. I never liked her, but that? She didn’t deserve that. And Fred… He…”

She swallowed hard and brushed her tears with her wrist. You move closer to her and give your hand around her shoulders. She leans in, letting you comfort her.

“Thanks… I… Fred was Ron’s brother, you know. The Christmases at Weasleys were never as before. There is always something – someone – missing. Everyone feels it. He was a troublemaker as his brother. And one had always good laugh with him.” Hermione suddenly sits straight again and looks at you.

“Thanks for listening to my wailing. Now, let’s move on. What about you and your love live? I’ve already told you pretty much about mine but don’t know anything about yours.” Hermione takes another sip of her drink and realizes she had already drunk all of it. She stands and motions for you to wait a moment while she gets back with another two butter beers even though you still have your first half full. You are surprised about the sudden change of the subject but think that Hermione probably didn’t want to talk about it anymore and who were you to push her?

She sits and looks at you waiting for you to answer.

“There isn’t much to talk about. I had some relationship but nothing lasted. I had some one night stands but that isn’t something I want, really. I was just desperate at that time. Now I’m giving myself a break. Maybe a little forced one, but I doubt I would find a match between other students – with their age and stuff…” You smile.

“So lady doesn’t like our students?” ask Hermione teasingly and you both laugh.

“Come on…” you say and get up, grabbing one of Hermione’s hands and drag her on the dancing floor. There is no one dancing, but you feel like it – _maybe the butter beer is stronger that it seems?_

The bartender plays the music louder and Hermione eventually gives up and joins you at the parquet. You both laugh and move in the rhythm of the music. There is some whistling but you both ignore it and just have fun, don’t minding the strange looks some of the witches are giving you.

You signalize to Hermione you are out of breath and both of you head back to your table. You both laugh while drinking rest of your beers. You are quite glad to sit down again; the heels you chose to wear weren’t one for dancing.

“It’s been long since last time I was dancing like this… If ever.” admits Hermione with wide smile.

“Same here… I’m not much a partying type. But you know what they say. With right friend one becomes a hell of a lunatic.” you say and add “Want to get shot?”

She thinks about it for a moment and then nod “We live just once, right? So let this first ladies night be remembered – or rather not after the dancing.” laughing you both approach the bar and order two vodkas.

As the drinks come you both say cheers and drink it all in one gulp.

“I have to tell you something.” Hermione says suddenly with some seriousness in her voice.

“Yes?” you ask.

“Ron.. He asked me to marry him.” She says shyly, her cheeks pink, partly from the alcohol, partly from shame.

You look at her hand but don’t see any ring. That makes you little confused because you are sure that Hermione is in love with that man. You search her face. “And you said…”

“And I didn’t say anything… Or rather that I need to think about it.” She confesses.

“You what? You are crazy, you love the man!” you exclaim.

“I know, but one has to think about such important step in his life, right?” she asks as waiting for you to confirm it.

“Yes, I suppose so…” you say to calm her down and order another shots of vodka.

After that you pay your bill and head out back to the castle. You are both little tipsy, giggling at nothing in particular. 

You get to your room just few minutes after midnight and almost quietly. Almost – you were able to trip over one step and cursed pretty loudly. Fortunately no one seemed to hear or bother to get out so you slip into your room unnoticed. You brushed your teeth and decided to take the shower at the morning as you were too tired now. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked this chapter. I would love if you would comment or give a kudos if you did. 
> 
> Enjoy your week and you may look forward for next chapter I will publish next week :)


	4. Chapter 4

You wake up with the sun already pretty high on the sky. You sit briskly and check the time. You have only 15 minutes before the start of divination class. Yesterday night was amazing and you had lot of fun, but you are tired as hell and decide that next time you should probably go out on Friday, not Monday. Taking shower and brushing your teeth is quick and you get dressed in black robes with yellow hem.

You storm out of your room behind the tree tapestry with handbag full of books and tie in your hand. As you rush around kitchens you remember your mug stayed on the table in your room. Deciding there is no time to get back for it you continue right for the class hoping you will be able to hang on and don’t fall asleep (or dead) during the class without your morning coffee or any breakfast.

Stepping in the class just after the professor, you sit in your desk at do all you can to listen. Not that it is much success, your eyes are falling shut but you somehow manage through it.

The next place you head to after the class is the kitchens. There would be no food in Great hall at this time, but you learnt that the elves are more than happy to give you some. You eat your breakfast in the kitchens. The elf named Tangle gave you baked cinnamon rolls and prepared perfect coffee.

“Good morning.” says Bill, one of your prefects. You nod with full mouth and take a sip to wash it down. He walks to you in the meantime and sits.

“Came for a snack?” you nudge him and smile.

“I did, actually – Tangle, please, I would love to have some of those.” He motions to your plate with cinnamon rolls. The elf bows and disappears just to appear moments later with another full plate. He hands it to Bill not looking into his eyes. You wonder why.

“Thank you.” says Bill taking the plate and stuff one roll in his mouth. He has pretty features – high cheekbones and long eyelashes. He looks at you and you withdrew realizing you were staring at him.

“What are you up to after the snack?” you ask because you have some free time when you are supposed to work on your project to Herbology.

“I’m going to library with others. We try to study together for NEWT’s but not much successfully though. We usually end up just talking quietly for the whole time. Would you wanna join?” suggests Bill taking another roll in his mouth. You nod and excuse yourself with promise you will join them in the library.

You walk in your room and take off the robes. You don’t like them much – loose and long, always getting under your feet. You instead change yourself to comfortable jeans with holes on the knees and black t-shirt and for once take your sneakers.

…………………………………………………….

The library is quiet and has friendly atmosphere. There is that smell of old books you love and so many books! You walk around and find a group of Ravenclaws and some Hufflepuffs, including Bill, sitting in the farthest corner of the library. There are sofas and nightstands full of books. Some students sit at the table they must have moved from another part of the library. The all greet you heartedly.

You choose to sit on a free chair at the table and take out your book of herbology and paper with pen. Although you are required to write with a quill in the classes, you prefer normal muggle pen – not having to bring the ink everywhere with you. So for notes you use the one you brought from home with you.

You focus on the text about mandragoras and take notes, eventually exchange some words with the others. The Ravenclaw students are indeed studying but Bill and his friends hadn’t even opened their books and are talking loudly enough to earn some annoyed looks from other visitors of the library. You decide there is no change you could focus on the project with so much talking around you and close the book.

“How do you focus in this?” you ask a Ravenclaw sitting next to you with amused smile on your face.

“One gets use to it. Give it another month or two.” she answers not looking up from the parchment she is reading.

You get up, walk closer to the Hufflepuffs and sit in the armchair that is unoccupied. They are talking about the quidditch. You already heard about the sport but didn’t have opportunity to watch it yet. There should be a match this Sunday though and you look forward to it. It won’t be as anything you saw before and that makes you exited. First is playing Gryffindor against Ravenclaw.

“Forks is good, but Alex is better. He will surely catch the snitch before Forks will even notice it.” says Helena, tall brown skinned girl with black curly hair tied back. You notice she wears the robes you took off in the room but she seems perfectly comfortable in them. The yellow color gets perfectly well with the color of her skin and you feel jealous for her for a quick moment.

_Maybe one just has to get used to them – as it goes for the learning in the noise._

“No, no, no. That is simply not possible.” Opposites Bill his eyes on Hel. “Alex might be better than Forks, but Gryffindor has better beaters so Alex here should have his eyes everywhere not just for the Snitch but also for the bludger if he doesn’t want to have broken arm.” finishes Bill and winks at Ravenclaw boy sitting at the sofa reading newspapers. He glances up and smirks at Bill who laughs.

You don’t fully understand the rules of the sport yet but you caught the basics. You may hardly contribute to this conversation so you just sit there and listen to the others talking but you don’t mind. Not long after that they start to bet which team will win. Hel turns to you and tries to make you take your bet.

“I’ve never seen them play. How should I bet?” you laugh at her persuading techniques.

“Just trust me and bet on Gryffindor. The only challenge for them is Slytherin. It has been like this for years.” Bill gives you a waggish smile.

You roll your eyes at him but agree to bet 50 Galleons on Gryffindor. 

As the time for lunch is getting closer you all get up and make your way out of the library toward the Great hall. You linger behind having problems to fit the book in your bag. Bill waits with you, looking a bit uncomfortable.

“You don’t have to wait. I know I’m first year but I’m sure I can find Great hall. I may just go after the smell..” you comment trying to ease the tense atmosphere that somehow happened to crawl between you two.

He chuckles. “I’m sure you can. I just… wondered if you would like to go to the Quidditch with me?”

“Are you asking me out?” you ask surprised.

“I’m.” he says with shy smile.

_Oh god…_

“Ehm, Bill, I really appreciate your proposition but I would rather just focus on my studying.” You try to explain. It is not like he isn’t attractive, he is for sure. And also he is pretty mature so you wouldn’t guess he is just going to turn 18 but you never had a thing for younger guys. And you do in fact just focus on the school, given you should complete 2 years in one.

Bill looks little bit hurt for few second but then shrugs and smiles. “Then maybe when you will see me play, you will change your mind and go out with me then.” He adds teasingly but laughs after as to say he is ok.

You nod and finally manage to push the book inside the bag and you two get going, chatting about Hufflepuff Quidditch team and how it succeeded in last years.

………………………………………………………….

The rest of the week goes by quickly. You finished your Herbology project at the Tuesday evening.

Wednesday was taken by Flying classes and Herbology. Madam Hooch had been trying to teach you how to gain control over the broomstick. You have to admit it is pretty cool to be able to just fly around but you don’t particularly like heights and think you will probably just stick to your silver Mercedes waiting for you in your garage.

Then you handed in your paper on Mandragoras to professor Sprout and worked with mandragoras in the greenhouses. _They are little devils_ , you recon after. At the evening there was some gathering in the Hufflepuff common room. Girls from third year baked for all off you cookies in the kitchens even though the elves protested and wanted to do the job themselves. You all then just sat, ate the cookies, some played games as chess; others just had a nice chat.

On Thursday nothing special happened and you spent the evening just reading in your room with a cup of hot chocolate you brought from kitchens before.

You have listened Hermione every dinner during the week talking about Ron’s request as she was considering its pros and cons. She even has written a list. You didn’t judge her – for some people it is just a big step in their life and they need time to get comfortable with the idea. In this case you even think that Ron had to be prepared for something like this. You know Hermione just for over month and half but wouldn’t be probably expecting anything different.

With your schedule mostly filled, time was going fast and you found yourself again in front of potions classroom with other students waiting in the corridor or already sitting on their seats inside.

You walk inside and find your seat. The dim light given by the lanterns on the walls make your head go heavy and you have to fight sleep. To do so you take a sip of your black coffee. You close your eyes and feel the caffeine pumping through your body. Yes, maybe not literary but you always liked to imagine it spreading through your veins. As you enjoy the feeling of the energy starting surging in you, you don’t realize the class has already started.

“If Miss wants to sleep, she may also do so in her room and come here at the evening for detention.” You hear ironic voice of Draco Malfoy. You open your eyes quickly and find professor Malfoy standing in front of your desk with a smirk on his face.

“Now focus Miss Cought.” He says harshly. You mumble quietly an apology.

Malfoy walks to his desk and lean back on it. He start his lesson on Bezoar stone, where it may be found and for what purposes one might use it. You listen and take notes and from time to time take a sip of the coffee. When you do it for the fifth time since he came, Malfoy eyes you hardly and takes your thermo-mug and vanishes it. You just glare at him open mouthed. You take in a breath and are ready to burst out screaming. _Who the fuck is he thinking he is to take my fucking coffee!_

He just waves his wand and when you try to say something, nothing comes out of your mouth. You wink surprised and try again. Then look at him angry but scared. _Was he even allowed to such thing?_

“Just a precaution for you not to get another detention for your words. I would really be angry having to spent here my weekend evening with you.” He spats the last words as an insult. It actually really sounds like one. Because there is nothing you could say, literary, you sit down and just watch him as he continues his lecture.

The final straw is when he asks a question and even though there is plenty hands up, he turns around to his cupboard and starts going through the vials in there and with a smirk on his face address you to answer the question. You try, you really do, but the hex he cast at you seems to be still working, no noise comes from your mouth. You eye your classmates desperately but you know none of them is going to stick up for you against Malfoy. He is turn on you sideways on purpose and with innocence he says: “Well, no answer, Miss Cought? I’m disappointed. I take 20 points from Hufflepuff.”


	5. Chapter 5

You were pissed about Malfoy hexing you but decided not to mention it to Hermione. You have been through some bullying in your school days but it’s not like you are kid anymore. You will deal with it yourself. You just don’t know how… Yet.

The weekend was crazy. Saturday was all talking about the upcoming quidditch match between Ravenclaw and Gryffindor. There was more betting – who will score more, who will get hit by a bludger, by how many points this or that house will win. You didn’t participate in those bets; one with Hel about the winning team was enough. The Sunday morning was charged with energy, people looking forward to the match. Special tension was between the two playing houses, it was rivalry but not the bad kind. You were all dressed in your house colors even though neither Hufflepuff nor Slytherin played. You sat with others from your house and watched the game tensely. It really was fun to watched and you cheered whenever Gryffindor scored – _Well, you wouldn’t cheer against your own bet, right?_

As Bill predicted, Gryffindor won over Ravenclaw with good 70 points ahead. You collected your money from Hel and then enjoyed the rest of the day in your common room with others, debating about the technique and other quidditch stuff. You couldn’t contribute to that much, but enjoyed it anyway. You also talked about it with Hermione at the dinner. She seemed genuinely excited and pleased. She talked about Harry Potter and his days at Hogwarts. He was the youngest seeker in the history of the school and according to her the best Gryffindor had in a long time.

Rest of the week has passed quickly. You even earned Hufflepuff some points in charms and ancient runes - though Hermione was careful with giving you points as you two were friends and someone could say she gave them to you just because. Flying was easier with every lesson but you were sure you will never be much comfortable with it, Herbology went just fine because you finally stopped working with mandragoras and moved to other plants.

You also helped Hermione and professor Sprout through the week with preparation of surprise birthday party for your astronomy teacher, professor Holystone. It should take place on Thursday evening after the dinner. As it turned out, this was her 30th birthday so the staff wanted to prepare something special for her. You planned how to decorate the staffroom without her noticing, discuss the cake and some gifts for Holystone.

The Thursday evening came and you were helping Hermione to decorate the staffroom while everybody else was on dinner. Hermione was levitating garlands around the room. You tried to help as well – it was perfect opportunity to practice the levitating charm you learned before. It was different from levitating just a feather and gave you some trouble. Hermione corrected you with articulation and your movement so you were able to levitate them at the end. Finally Hermione conjured the gifts from nowhere and you pilled them under the window. Then it was all done. You checked the room on your way out and joined the rest of the stuff not to be suspicious when you were satisfied with the look.

In a few minutes you are again in the staffroom with other professors waiting for Holystone to show up. She does and you all shout “Surprise” in unison and clap. Her eyes waters as she looks around the room, speechless. You all move to congratulate her and then move to the giant cake the elves were making whole day. While you eat your cake Holystone unwraps her gifts. There is new robe, some goodies for owls and beautiful painting of landscape.

When you finish your portion, rather quickly because you are hungry and didn’t have time to have a dinner, you move to take another bit. The same goes for Hermione. You eat your second piece and talk about nothing and everything. In a while you notice that not everyone is here. Malfoy is missing. Not that you mind that much, but it surprises you because beside him, everyone is here.

_Maybe it shouldn’t surprise me, after all._

You try to focus back to Hermione but find that impossible as your mind goes every time back to Malfoy. You excuse yourself with decision to find him and confront him of being a dick not showing on the party.

You wonder the castle for few minutes trying to figure out where he could be. You check the potions classroom and his cabinet but with no luck. You’ve almost given up when you notice nearly invisible light up the Astronomy tower. It might be not him but you decide to check it.

You climb up the stairs and are short of breath. _So many fucking stairs!_ With the last few you look around to see if it is Malfoy who lit this place up with small lantern standing on the last step. You must be lucky – or not – because it actually is Malfoy.

He sits just at the edge of the tower, his legs swing in the air. You can’t see his face for his head is lowered with platinum hair covering it but you notice a bottle in his hand. His back are crouched he doesn’t seem to notice you. The wind is blowing harshly but it is bearable.

You take a few steps in his direction when he turns his head toward you. He eyes you skeptically and then returns his attention to staring into nothingness. You want to tell him about the party and how rude it was from him not to show up but you seem incapable of doing so. He seems already miserable enough, sitting like this. You move again and sit next to him, not looking in his direction, ignoring him. He does the same.

After a minute or two just staring in the black night around you, you reach for the bottle he is holding. His eyes flash at you and he tightens his grip on his bottle.

“What? You won’t even share?” you ask imitating hurt voice. He continues to watch you for a while and then reluctantly hands you the bottle. It turns out to be a firewhiskey and it is already half drank. You take a sip and make a face as the alcohol burns his way down your throat. You see Malfoy smirk and you take another sip, this time bigger. You swallow and place the bottle between you. He doesn’t move to retrieve it back.

“What do you want?” he asks sharply but his voice is also muffled with the amount of alcohol he drank before you came.

“Have a drink.” You motion toward the bottle.

“And you couldn’t do that in your room?”

“I could. But I do not have this stuff there.” You say and are surprised with the sound of laugh from Malfoy.

“And I was searching for you. Why weren’t you at the party for professor Holystone?”

You watch him as he reaches for the bottle again and take a big gulp. “I wasn’t feeling like going.” He says not looking at you. You wait for him to continue but he doesn’t seem willing to add anything else.

“Alright.” You drink again when he pass the bottle back to you and already feel little dizzy.

“Maybe you shouldn’t drink that much. Look at you, you are a light weight.” He comments as he watches you with his liquor.

You humph and shot back “Maybe you shouldn’t be sitting at the edge of the tower while being drunk like shit.”

You can see amusement in his face.

 _Oh yeah, you can swear as well._ Although you don’t do that very often aloud.

Then he laughs again and actually moves a bit and leans with his back against the column, one leg stretch toward you, the other still swinging in the air. You do the same and have to support yourself because you actually are not just little dizzy but a lot. You sit like that for a while, facing each other. You have a perfect position to finally search his face. His eyes seem sad and he has large black circles under them. You wonder how you didn’t notice them earlier. His face features are sharp and his forehead is covered with platinum hairs – he normally have them combed but now they are messy and for a moment you have the strange urge to pull them with your hand. 

“So, tell me, the truth now. Why did you came up here.” He requests, his eyes on you.

You think about what to say. You did tell him the truth, kind of, but it doesn’t seem to satisfy him.

“I came to tell you that you are being a dick not showing at the party.” You mumble. You were going to tell him this and you did, kind of, just in more temperate way. It’s not a thing you say to someone drunk at the tower, them being at the edge. More so if they look so miserable as Malfoy does.

“That’s more like it.” He says with a smirk and sadness in his voice. “Well, you are right, I’m being a dick, not that I could do any different.”

“How do you mean that?” you ask and wait for the answer while he is taking another sip of the firewhiskey. Then he hands it to you. You take it gratefully. Having this almost heart to heart conversation with someone who bullied you just week before, you need some liquid encouragement to do so.

Malfoy answers while you are playing with the lit of the bottle.

“You didn’t notice? That’s what everyone expects from me. Former death eater, pure blood, Malfoy for that, which doesn’t make thing better thanks to my father.” He spits the word father as if it is an acid. He pulls up the sleeve of his suit and shows you the dark mark he has somehow tattooed on his forearm. It is scarred all over. You glare at it, not able to speak. _Did he try to cut it out?_

“Now you see? I’m a monster and here is the proof!” he claims and covers his arm again with the sleeve.

“I don’t really think…” you try to oppose but he stops you with a wave of his hand so instead you finally take another gulp. Your head is spinning from the stuff – it must be stronger then what you are use to drink.

“Well you must be really blind. The way everyone looks at me? They spite me and I don’t blame them. I spite myself.” He turns his head gazing into the night. You notice something in his eyes but can’t place it. Maybe it is regret? Pain? You have another urge to move closer and embrace him but you are not drunk enough to do that. You know it wouldn’t be accepted well. But you move your leg so it would touch his slightly. He twitches a little but then relaxes again. You are glad that he doesn’t move away, sort of accepting the small consolation.

You don’t know what to say to that so you are quite, just being present. He is the one who breaks the silent.

“I can’t sleep here, you know…” his voice suddenly softer then you ever heard him over the two moths here.

“When I close my eyes of Him, the red eyes staring at me, deathly, fiercely…In the nights I have nightmares of the evening in June. It was end of the year. Dumbledore was standing here where we are sitting…” he continues. You watch him carefully, his sad, tired grey eyes. He is looking somewhere behind you now but not seeing anything from present time, probably re-living the past.

“I came here after Madam Rosmerta shot the dark mark on the sky. He was standing here, alone, almost looked like waiting for me. He was so calm even though he knew what I was supposed to needed to do. But I wasn’t able to do it. Not even that. I was weak and pathetic. And I’m still like that.” His eyes are watered now and you have to fight your compulsion to hug him, comfort him, say he is not weak. You just sit and listen.

“Then Snape came. He did what I was supposed to do. He killed him. I can’t get out of my head that look in Dumbledore’s eyes he gave me just second before. It haunts me the same way Voldemort’s eyes do.” Now angry he jerks the bottle you are holding from your hands and drinks the rest of it.

Your heart is aching with the need to convince him he is not like that. When you find your voice, you know what you must say. You don’t want to, but just have to.

“You know,” you start slowly, taking your time. “you are not the only one who is fucked up. I… Hell, I’m first year being 21 – something has to be really wrong with me..” you say and give a nervous laugh trying to ease your nervousness.

“One could say I had everything when I grew up – loving parents, money… But I wasn’t happy. I was actually really miserable. I wanted more attention, I suppose. So I stopped eating. I was looking like a skeleton after a short time. I enjoyed I pained my parents, that I troubled them. I enjoyed that they spent their money for my treatment. And I almost died doing that. I put them through hell just because I could. Now tell me, who is the twisted one?” you finish and take a deep breath. You are glad that you have that done. You hate to talk about it, you hate yourself for doing that to your parents and you spite yourself for that.

“Let’s drink for the freaknesness of both of us then.” He says with amused voice and pull out a small vial and opens it. It has strong smell of pine tree and it makes you bit nauseous. Malfoy take a sip and hands you the vial.

“What is it?” you ask warily, taking the vial from him

“It’s a perk of being the potions master and a teacher with unlimited supplies.”

“Just a clarification, I don’t really think that the others here think about you not even half as bad as you think of yourself.” You say as you move the vial to your lips and drink the rest of the potion.

You feel sick for a moment but then a sweet sensation spreads through your body. You open your eyes and find Draco watching you. Your mind is somehow more fogged than before and you feel as your laugh bubbles through you. You can’t help yourself and laugh out loudly.

“What… What is it suppose to do?” you ask between short breaths.

Draco laughs as well and answers with soft cracked voice: “It makes one feel better. Does it accomplish its purpose?” he asks and moves to sit more straight and in the same time he is closer to you than ever before.

It does make you feel good. You feel dizzy and not think straight but you feel good. As good as you haven’t felt for a long time. You nod and just watch the beautiful night.

_Why haven’t I notice it, that it was so magical?_

You hear Malfoy clear his throat and you turn your head to face him. He is looking to the night the same as were you, but now, you are looking at him, his eyelashes, and his lips. He turns his head around and you find yourself just millimeters away from them. You do not seem able to stop hypnotizing them.

 _They look so delicious._ You wish you could taste them, see for sure that they were as delicious as they look. When you look up you feel like falling, falling into the darkness and deepness of Draco’s eyes. You feel his breath on your lips and it send shiver through your body and it ends right between your legs.

You almost give in and reach forward to kiss him, but in that moment, he pulls away and stands warily.

“Good night, Jennifer.” He says and with effort makes his way down the tower.

You seem to get back to yourself and you shake your head. It turned out not to be the best idea ever as your head spin. You lie down on the cold floor. You know you should feel rejected but somehow find yourself just feeling thrilled and good. The image of Draco’s lips creeps into your mind and it makes you shiver once more. You look around again checking if you are alone.

You move your hands and softly touch the hem of your pants with one hand while the other trails under your shirt and reach your breast. You play with yourself while making your way to your most intimate zone. You arch up as the pleasure starts building up in you while you touch yourself. The potion surely has impact on you because you are squirming under your own hands in less than 5 minutes.

The images of Malfoy touching you, kissing you where you finger yourself is so erotic and hot it makes you moan loudly. At first you put just one finger in but after few moves you need more friction and add another. You move your fingers quickly and add your thumb to stimulate your clitoris in the same time. You feel desperate need of release as the heat in your lower belly starts to be unbearable and you bit your lip not to scream loudly as you circle quickly over your clit and come over your fingers, squeezing them with your pussy.

You breathe quickly, feeling amazing and suddenly tired. You might even drift off like this, one hand in your panties, wet from your own juice, but some small part of you is still being conscious and you remember that you are in Astronomic tower and it wouldn’t be the best thing if someone would find you here like that.

You try to get up but it is trickier than you thought. Finally you manage it and with the support of the handrail you walk down the stairs. It takes you three times as long as the way up did, but you aware that going just a bit quicker might resolve in some broken bones or a head injury.

Staggering around the castle you finally are able to find you dorm and fall into your bed. You fall asleep with a though that this wasn’t at all the evening you were anticipating.


	6. Chapter 6

Your head feels like thousands sharp shreds are stung in it. You turn around on your bed and moan. Lying flat on the bed for few minutes doesn’t improve a thing so you decide to get up and give yourself cold shower but it is easier said than done. You push yourself to sitting position, not daring to open your eyes yet, and immediately fight the urge to puke. Wish all your mental power you slowly stand up and open your eyes just a little. The light is torturing but if you want to get to the bathroom you need to keep them open at least till you get to the door.

With shaky steps you move your body in the direction of bathroom. Just when you get there, another urge to vomit comes and you collapse right on the toilet and spent there more than 5 minutes squirming. When your stomach sets a bit you take a cold shower. It helps, sort of… You feel the cold tendrils of water dropping down of your body; numbing the pain and helping you clear your mind to some partly conscious state.

 _I’m never gonna drink again._ You promise yourself while dressing up slowly into white shirt and skirt this time. You don’t think about it much, just put some clothes on, happy with the outcome of not being naked in your classes.

 _Oh hell.. The classes..._ You remember your lessons for today are double potions.

 _I wonder how will Malfoy look after yesterday._ You think while dragging yourself to the door of your room. You stop at the doorjamb and lean against it with your forehead. It is pleasantly cold and you wish it would be possible to just stay like this whole day.

With effort you make yourself move to the kitchens.

“Good morning Jenny.” calls someone behind you while walking quickly past you. You cover your ears and hum in answer because you are not able to come out with any actual word and your mouth is so fucking dry.

“Rough night, heh?” asks familiar voice.

You peer through one open eye and see Bill smiling in your direction. He is smiling at you and watching you with piti in his gaze.

 _How can anyone be happy and smiling in such a morning?_

When you don’t answer he claps on your back and walks away. You concentrate back on the task before you and that is getting very very black and strong coffee. You move slowly, looking like zombie and jerking every time anybody says something out loud – and right now, everything sounds as screaming. The corridor seems somehow longer than any other time before. _And everyone is cheerful and so damn loud!_ You lament in your head. Fortunately the kitchens are one story down the ground so no windows are here and the light is coming just from enchanted torches. It enlightens the corridor with warm light.

You knock at the door leading to the kitchens. It is actually not a door but a painting of fruits in a bowl. It is not locked or charmed in any way so only elves would be able to open them, but you just cannot conjure enough energy to do that yourself. Young elf opens the painting and bows seeing you. You would normally tell him not to bow that you are no one special, but today you just walk around him and collapse on the chair standing by the table.

“Miss Caught, miss. Have you come for your coffee?” asks Tangle rushing to you.

You nod and take out your mug form your handbag. Tangle takes it and rush away to make the coffee.

The kitchens always smell nice. There are many elves rushing this or other way with plates, trays full of food, goblets and kettles with hot tea and hot chocolate. They are placing the tableware on the tables. They are positioned same way as in the Great hall. Hermione explained to you that the dishes are place on the tables in the kitchens and then conjured up. You see cinnamon rolls, pies, buns and cakes. There are also toasts and butter, plates full of ham and cheese, and many more. Your mouth would normally water with the sight but today is completely different story.

You look away from the food and just stare blankly on your hands laying in your lap.

“Miss Caught, miss. Your coffee.” Tangle stands in front of you with your mug full of deliciously smelling beverage. You take it and thank the elf for making it. You don’t know how, but the coffee from Tangle tastes like anything else.

“Thank you, Tangle.” You manage to answer and take the first sip and even though you burn your tongue you just simply love it. You sit for another 5 minutes sipping your coffee and enjoying the spreading energy. Then you finally convince yourself to get up and make your way to the dungeons for double potions.

You walk slowly through the corridors. The paintings wish you good morning and you murmur answers while drinking your coffee. The hallways start to fill with students rushing around you this or other way. You check the time and make yourself walk a bit quicker because potions are going to start in 5 minutes. The corridors down in the castle are dim and you are glad they are because otherwise your head might just split. They are made of dark cold stone and one may find spider webs in the corners. Dungeons are the coldest place of the castle and you pull your brown cardigan closer to your body and decide it is time to start wearing scarf and warm socks.

You walk into the classroom in the last minute, find your place, take the last sip of coffee and shove the empty mug inside your hand bag while pulling the books out.

You wait for the start of the lesson and think about yesterday night and how honest Malfoy was. One might even say he was kind of nice. You feel almost sorry for him. Of course, he made mistakes during the war, but he was bloody kid in that time. It isn’t fair that his past is hunting him when he might not even had actual chance to behave otherwise given his parents were Death Eaters themselves, not to mention his aunt. You remember the list of Death Eaters in the book, the pictures of some of them. The look on Lestrange’s face gave you creep – she really looked like a madman. 

_Well, maybe he won’t be such ass after yesterday._ You tell yourself.

The moment he walks into the class you watch him with open mouth. He looks as good as ever, his hair combed back with perfection and smirk on his face. There are no black circles under his eyes, at least not more than other days. He walks energetically to the front, his black suit highlight his lean tall figure. You can’t help yourself but think about your daydream back on the tower and wonder how he would really feel against your body.

“Today we will brew the potion we talked about last week. Find your notes and prepare the ingredients.” He instructs right away without any _Good morning_ or anything. Students start to move to cupboards to take the ingredients for the potion.

You stay still and watch him as he sits and writes something on a paper, his eyes down. “Miss Caught, shouldn’t you be doing something?” he asks not looking at you.

You get up quickly. Too quickly and you stomach make a flip and you must hold onto the table when your head spin.

 _Oh fuck._ You close your eyes take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself and fight the urge to throw up again. This time Malfoy doesn’t look to his paper but right at you, his eyes pinning you at the spot. You finally feel the blood return to your head and are better a little bit.

Malfoy stands and make his way in your direction. He stops just in front of you and eyes you sternly. You can smell his cologne and citruses .You shiver and look to his grey eyes.

“I see you had a fun last night. Maybe next time drink less and learn more. One would think that in your age, you would already be able to control yourself. You better hold your liquor.”

You stare at him, mouth open. When you realize that, you shut it and blink rapidly. You don’t get what is going on. That is not what you have been expecting him to say at all. _Did he just… How can he…_ Your brain seems not be working because you just cannot understand how he can just say that after he drank probably half the stock he had.

You finally jerk back to present and feel a smirk taking place on your face. Malfoy raise his eyebrows as in challenge. You can almost hear him say _Just say it and I’m gonna make your life hell on earth._

Your face goes to stone and you walk around him to get the ingredients for the potion. Malfoy returns to his desk, leans against it and watches the class lazily as the students prepare their cauldrons.

You stand at your desk again and start to brew the water. While the water boils, you chop the Canis root. Other students already start to add the root to the brew and it smells awful. Your stomach protests but you make yourself focus on chopping, ignoring the unpleasant feeling. You add the root as well and stir it two times clockwise and one time counter-clockwise. You check your notes and a book The basics of potion brewing for your next step. As the book says, you reach for the dust of the Bleeding crown and measure thoroughly one perfectly flat spoon. Whilst you try not to spill it anywhere someone bounces to your shoulder and the dust flies through the air, half splash into the potion, half ending on the table. You turn angrily to see Malfoy walking away like nothing happened.

You feel anger rising in your chest and swear to yourself that you won’t give him the satisfaction of outburst so he could give you detention and take any more points from Hufflepuff. You decide to do what you can to repair the damage. Even though you try to add the exact sum of the mushroom to the brew that ended on the desk, you do not quite do that well enough and the potion has darker shade of orange that it is suppose to have.

As the end of the class is coming you feel not just hangover but also irritated that that son of a bitch destroyed your potion. It even smells different that the other potions do. You take the glass vial and fill it carefully with your messed up potion. You are very careful because the brew is not just hot but also acidic so one doesn’t want it on one’s skin.

You turn around ready to hand it in when a first year boy from Gryffindor stumble over his own leg while he watched your ass in the skirt and spills his potion right on your shirt. It starts to burn its way through it immediately and you already feel it burn your skin.

“Take it off!” you hear alarmed voice of Malfoy behind you and you quickly work the buttons on the shirt to take it off. It burns your fingers but you manage to pull it down with the cardigan which is also splashed with the bloody potion. You breath quickly and your heart is racing with adrenalin and pain.

Malfoy strides quickly toward you with an open vial of antidote potion in his hand and spray you with the content. The burning pain stops right away but you can see the red scarred skin on your chest. Well, everybody can see it, actually. You stand in the middle of the classroom just in your skirt and laced white bra, which is actually not really hiding anything because it is now soaked with the antidote spray. Your breath hitch in your throat and you just stand there not knowing what to do.

Malfoy angrily turns and eyes the student boy, lighting in his glare. The boy suddenly seems smaller than before, slightly shaking.

“20 point from Gryffindor and detention tomorrow evening Mr. Belize!” he says with dangerous look and then turns around to look at you again. You are still in shock not able to understand what happened, your brain somehow still trying to catch up with the last minute.

Now the lightning in his eyes changes as he watches you, his eyes fixed on your chest. There is the look in his eyes you saw yesterday, as you see his eyes slide over your breast, stopping over your nipples clearly visible through the soaked lingerie. You are glad that even though you were hangover you choose this bra over others, it makes your breasts round and in your opinion beautiful.

You feel your face go pink when you realize it’s not just Malfoy who is staring at your almost like naked upper part of your body and you try to cover yourself a little. That seems to pull Malfoy back to present and he clears his throat and tears his eyes of your equipment. 

“To the Healing wing Miss.” He commands with low deep voice and you wonder if this is how he sounds when he is aroused. You definitely saw a wanton in his face, his pupils wide as he watched you. You shake your head to stop this absurd thinking when you are burned and return to the present.

You look around desperately for something to cover yourself with. You really don’t want to strand the castle half naked. Malfoy have already turned around when you clap on his shoulder with one finger. He turns around with annoyed face.

You take a deep breath, preparing yourself to ask. “Could you please borrow me… your… ehm… jacket?” you manage to say and motion to him with one hand while the other is covering your breast a little.

“My what?” he seems surprised but then realizes. “Oh, yeah, of course.” He mumbles with little frown on his face. You watch him as he strips the jacket of him. The shirt he is wearing gives you the perfect sight of his mussels under it. He hands you the jacket and you take it quickly, covering your naked torso.

“Everyone back to the desks. I’m going to walk Miss Caught to the hospital. Wait here for me.” He says in sudden decision. He turns and motion for you to take your leave.

You do and he joins you. You walk quietly for a while, him walking beside you, almost touching your arm. You want to touch him, to shag him but also strangle him. He is so confusing. You remember the previous night, the look on his face, the glint in his eyes as he watched you closely, how your lips almost touched. Then other picture comes to your mind – him hexing you last time, poking you today. You don’t understand him and it suddenly makes you so angry. You stop in the middle of the corridor and as he turns around you find yourself yelling at him, right there in the shadow of the corridor.

“So what is this? You are being a dick at first, then you drink with me up the tower and are sincere, talking openly, being even nice and then are dick again, deliberately ruining my potion? I would’ve sworn we had a moment up there at the tower. I saw how you looked at me just moments ago in the classroom, too consumed with my boobs you didn’t even consider that it is inappropriate to check me up like this! What the heck do you want?!” You feel your cheeks going red with anger and loss of breath. Your chest feels like in fire again and you fingers burning agonizingly as the antidote potion is starting to wear off but you manage to keep your eyes locked with his.

His stony impassive face turns to angry one in a split of a second. He moves quickly toward you and in next moment you are pinned between him and the wall, feeling the cold stone through the thin layer of his jacket. He has his arms on both sides of your head and is so close to you that you feel his breath on your lips. Your eyes are still locked and you see his darkening and his pupils going wide again. There is no more anger in there, but lust and wanton. The same must be written in your face, you are sure because you feel the heat spreading through your body. All your anger is gone. You want nothing else but to move closer and taste his lips. Your eyes slide to them, perfectly pink and just centimeters from yours, ready to be kissed. Your heart is beating madly and you breath is stuck in your throat. You feel his warmth through his shirt and realize that all you are wearing in skirt and his jacket, which is not even buttoned. Standing there you forget your pain and can feel every part of your body tingling with excitement, you want to be touched everywhere, be embraced in those arms, lifted up and fucked just like this, in the corridor. Your body responds to the image in your mind and you shiver with desire.

This all takes just second but it feels like minutes, hours. Then Malfoy’s look changes and you see despair and anger in them again.

“And what do you expect me doing? What do you even want from me?” he asks roughly and pushes away from you. He gives you last angry look and then turns around and head back towards the potions classroom. You suddenly feel cold, lonely.

You stand there and watch him marching away from you. You were so sure he would kiss you. You wanted him to do so. Desperately. Your heart is still beating fast so you close your eyes and make it slow down with some deep breaths. There are tears threatening to spill up but you push them back. There is no need for that. You won’t spill not one tear for that git, you swear yourself. You make the sadness of rejection go back to anger as it hurts less and you find at least some dignity in that. 

_I ask that first, you jerk!_ You retort back in your head and start again toward the Hospital wing, again aware of the pain that is now surging through all your body. You actually cannot be sure if it is just the potion that makes your chest hurt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you ejoyed the chapter. I won't publish next week because the seventh chapter is longer that any other yet and with some family issues I don't have enought time to finish it in time. Thank you for your understanding. :)


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